Archive for November, 2009

Getting Your Ex Back from Someone Else’s Arms

Saturday, November 28th, 2009

When a relationship ends, it leaves behind scars of pain, confusion and even resentment.  These scars can heal and people can move on.  However, sometimes moving on is not on the agenda because you can’t stop loving and wanting him. It’s a normal reaction to finally being alone after some time. This is even more so if you know your ex is already seeing someone else and you are left with no choices.  Thinking of getting your ex back seems impossible…This is not necessarily so.  Just because he is with someone else, it doesn’t mean the door is closed and locked.  There might be a way you can get back in.

If he’s already chosen to be with someone else then it’s extremely likely that he’s done this on the rebound. That kind of relationship is usually short-lived and is largely entered into as a temporary replacement for the serious one that has just ended and as a source of solace and support.  It doesn’t mean he has moved on.  It means he’s trying to.

Have confidence in yourself and your history together.  Make a resolve to wait it out patiently and make sure he continues to see you at your best… in terms of how you look and in what you say and what you do.  By doing this, it will give him strong and consistent reminders of everything he ever saw in you.  Then, if his fledgling relationship is indeed failing to take flight, those reminders might be the things that send him back into your arms.  As the saying goes, you never know what you’ve got till it’s gone. Get more tips here: http://themagicofmakingup.com/makingup

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Posted in Get Back Your Ex | 3 Comments »

Fix Your Relationship? Relationship Questions You’ll Likely Want to Know

Thursday, November 19th, 2009

There are a number of questions you need to take into consideration if you would like to fix any problems in your relationship. Even when the prospects are fairly good, it is still a tricky thing to mend relationships, and it is hence crucial that you make use of the most appropriate questions. This is what will help you to get the necessary pieces of information to fix a relationship.

Asking the right questions has its own challenges, and many people find it difficult to do it. People generally try to evade problems as much as they can.

Take action

In order to tackle relationship problems, you will need to take action, as they won’t magically disappear on their own. Once you have noticed that there is a problem, you should take the initiative to fix it before things get out of hand. It is your responsibility and trying to avoid it will only worsen the situation.

It is for this reason that you need to be aware of the right questions to ask in order to solve the problem. Here are some of the questions you need to bear in mind.

What do you want?

This is an important question that you need to ask both yourself and your partner. This will help you to have a clear perspective of what to expect out of your relationship. You will be able to determine whether both of you do have compatible interests, which is important for a sound relationship.

When were the best moments we shared?

This question is also helpful in determining how each spouse looks at the relationship. You may find that each of you gives very different moments as the best ones, which will help you to determine where possible problems lie. You will thus be able to know the areas you need to work on.

What are the things you don’t like?

Both of you need to answer this question honestly without being clouded by emotions. You should not let your partner’s response hurt your feelings; neither should you use this as an opportunity to point fingers. This question is also very helpful in determining possible problem areas.

Where do you think we are headed?

This question will help you to find out what each of you thinks of the future of your relationship. You may be surprised to discover that things are more serious than you thought.

When you ask these relationship questions, you will be able to get important information that will not only help you to know the real state of your relationship, but also necessary measures you need to take in order to fix your relationship. You should realize that this is not the end of the road, but just the beginning.

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Lets Just Be Friends? The Phrase that Spells the End?

Monday, November 9th, 2009

Nobody wants to hear this.  Everybody just knows bad news is on the way. You thought your relationship was serious but now the walls have fallen in.  If she loves then, well, she loves you, so why does she want things to change? Is she trying to let you down gently?  Or is there more to it than that?

Here are the most likely explanations of what she means, and some good advice on how to react and deal with it.

The first thing to realize is that, even though she’s using these words, let’s just be friends’, she might not have a clear idea of what she wants and how she feels.  Obviously something has changed in your relationship to the extent that she feels the need to reclassify it.  In the worst situations this really does mean it’s over, and there’s no getting around that.

But, if she’s more confused than convinced then ‘lets just be friends’ could be posing two subtly different propositions:

Situation A - “We had something great for a while, but things change and I just don’t think our relationship has any future.  Please don’t be mad at me – I just think it’s for the best”.

Situation B - “We used to feel so strongly about each other, but I’m not sure if that strength is still there.  We’ve had some rough times and I need space and time to think about the future – but I’m not saying I don’t want to see you any more”.

If it’s situation A, then it’s time for you to accept that this is the end of the road.  Don’t waste time and hope on a relationship that’s history.  But if it’s situation B, then she’s still open to persuasion. Tread carefully, take your time and find out what it would take to get things back on track.

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Posted in Let's Just Be Friends | 3 Comments »

My Ex Wants Me Back – Here’s Some Positive Signs

Wednesday, November 4th, 2009

The end of a relationship leaves a lot of mess. It’s rarely clean, crisp and straightforward and it leaves both partners with a lot of conflicting feelings. You may well be wishing you could try again. And it’s just as likely that your ex feels the same.  So if you’ve been looking for signs in what he says, what he does, who he’s with or where he goes, you might be starting to believe that he wants the same as you. But you don’t want to invite the pain of being rebuffed. So you need to be sure if your ex he wants you back.  And some of the clearest and easiest signs to read are how hard and how often he tries to get in touch with you after your breakup.

Think about how he’s approaching you.  Is he seeking you out and is he doing so more often than you might have expected in the aftermath of a breakup?  Is asking you things that lead you to believe he’s genuinely interested in how you are and what you’re doing?  Is he responding warmly to your news?  If the answers are yes then he may well be starting to realize that losing you has left a gap in his life. For many people, a breakup is one of the best ways of crystallizing feelings and bringing them to a full recognition of their feelings. This could be happening to him.

But tread carefully.  Don’t necessarily PLAY HARD TO GET but equally don’t jump to the conclusion that he’s just waiting for you to run into his arms.  It’s a process that takes a little time and if you act too soon he may not be ready and you’ll have missed your chance.  If he clearly still has feelings for you they’re unlikely to go away.  He just needs the time to recognize them fully.  So patience is the key.

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He’s With a Woman Now – Are We Finished?

Sunday, November 1st, 2009

So many people flee from one relationship right into another.  Everybody’s heard about being on the rebound.  It makes the end of your relationship seem truly final to see your ex already settled with someone else.  But is that really true?  You’ll be surprised – and heartened – to know that your partner’s rebound might rebound them straight back to you. How?

In some ways a breakup feels easier to handle if you both come out of it alone. There’s balance and a feeling of suspension. You’ve both lost something but you’re both still in the same place. However, if you see him with someone else almost immediately, it’s only natural for you to feel that you’ve been left behind for good. 

The truth is more complicated because in most cases a relationship on the rebound is not really a relationship at all.  It’s a substitute, a response to feelings of withdrawal. Suddenly deprived of one of the most important relationships in his life, your ex needs something that feels and looks the same.

But it can’t be the same because it doesn’t include you. He will overcompensate; he will try everything in his power to convince himself that the new woman in his life can take your place. But the more he tries, the more he’ll compare her to you and on your side; you have a shared history and all the things he ever loved about you.

Stick around. Bide your time. Keep yourself accessible. There’s every chance the moment will come when he fully realizes his mistake and that’s when you can make your move. Your revived relationship may emerge stronger than ever.

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Posted in Rebound Relationship | 1 Comment »