Archive for the ‘Save Your Relationship’ Category

Fix Your Relationship? Relationship Questions You’ll Likely Want to Know

Thursday, November 19th, 2009

There are a number of questions you need to take into consideration if you would like to fix any problems in your relationship. Even when the prospects are fairly good, it is still a tricky thing to mend relationships, and it is hence crucial that you make use of the most appropriate questions. This is what will help you to get the necessary pieces of information to fix a relationship.

Asking the right questions has its own challenges, and many people find it difficult to do it. People generally try to evade problems as much as they can.

Take action

In order to tackle relationship problems, you will need to take action, as they won’t magically disappear on their own. Once you have noticed that there is a problem, you should take the initiative to fix it before things get out of hand. It is your responsibility and trying to avoid it will only worsen the situation.

It is for this reason that you need to be aware of the right questions to ask in order to solve the problem. Here are some of the questions you need to bear in mind.

What do you want?

This is an important question that you need to ask both yourself and your partner. This will help you to have a clear perspective of what to expect out of your relationship. You will be able to determine whether both of you do have compatible interests, which is important for a sound relationship.

When were the best moments we shared?

This question is also helpful in determining how each spouse looks at the relationship. You may find that each of you gives very different moments as the best ones, which will help you to determine where possible problems lie. You will thus be able to know the areas you need to work on.

What are the things you don’t like?

Both of you need to answer this question honestly without being clouded by emotions. You should not let your partner’s response hurt your feelings; neither should you use this as an opportunity to point fingers. This question is also very helpful in determining possible problem areas.

Where do you think we are headed?

This question will help you to find out what each of you thinks of the future of your relationship. You may be surprised to discover that things are more serious than you thought.

When you ask these relationship questions, you will be able to get important information that will not only help you to know the real state of your relationship, but also necessary measures you need to take in order to fix your relationship. You should realize that this is not the end of the road, but just the beginning.

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Utilizing Relationship Self Help Advice to Soothe a Troubled Relationship

Thursday, May 7th, 2009

When you begin searching for relationship advice, you can find it in numerous places. You can find it in friends and family, who don’t mind sharing their knowledge. You can find it through a therapist, who can listen to your problems. You can find advice in books and online. However, it’s most important to remember that the best advice comes in the form of relationship self-help. What does this mean? It means you have to fix what is wrong with a relationship on your own; no one else can do it for you.

Think about this for a moment: why is that most people start out fine in a relationship, only to fail some time later? After all, most people just want three things in their life: happiness, success and most importantly…love. What is it that makes people fail in relationships so easily? It’s actually the breakdown of three things that many people tend to forget over the course of the relationship. When the relationship begins to breakdown, it’s imperative to do relationship self-help on leaning these three things once more.

3 Relationship Self-Help Advices to Ponder

1.  Staying Strong
There are very few people who like a needy, desperate person. Chances are you were a strong emotionally and spiritually and that was one of the things that attracted them to you in the beginning. Over the course of the relationship, it’s likely a little insecurity slipped in and desperation about holding onto the relationship changed your perception a bit, causing you to act desperate and needy. It’s imperative that you revert this course and find a way back to your former self.

2. Non Verbal Communications
Do you remember the times that you would sneak each other looks, knowing what the other person was thinking and feeling at that very moment? Does it seem like the relationship lost that vibe and fell into a routine of “Yeah, I know what you are thinking but…?” Did you constantly want to touch your significant other but now it’s like no big deal? If so, then it’s time to reclaim those feelings. Every now and then, do little non-verbal gestures that made a difference and let your other half know that you care.

3.  Avoiding Conflicts and Talking Out Arguments
Does it seem like fights rule your relationship and nothing gets worked out? Conflicts do arise in a relationship so it’s very important to talk out your problems. However, do it only after all the emotions have settled down. Don’t forget that people often say things they do not mean in a fight so it’s important that things are not taken too seriously in a heated argument. Instead, wait for everything to cool down and then speak. If it seems like no common ground can be found in an argument, it’s probably best to let the matter rest.

How does this coincide with relationship self-help? Actually, when you have the ability to stop a conflict before it starts and couldn’t do this before, you are helping yourself minimize the stress you feel along with any conflict that could arise from a heated discussion.

If you are truly serious about making a relationship work, seeking out relationship self-help advice is necessary. It doesn’t mean that everything will change in an instant but it certainly won’t change if you don’t have the guidance to help you change. Remember this phrase: you can’t make anyone else happy until you make yourself happy.

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Top 5 Sure Ways to Saving a Relationship

Sunday, March 1st, 2009

Are you in the process of saving a relationship? Do you know how you can do this without further damaging the already fragile state that the relationship is in? When people are in the process of saving a relationship, they may say the wrong things that make the situation worse and any plan they have to save it backfire. How do you know what to say that will stop things from getting worse? Here are some things you should know if you are saving a relationship.

(1)  Blame

First and most important, do not lay blame. Stop accusing one another and stop judging each other. If you are working towards saving a relationship, you can’t do this when you are blaming each other for problems that arise in the relationship. When you attack each other, the other person will go into defensive mode and the fight escalates. This is when both of you need to step back and realize that both of you are to blame. Only then can you continue saving a relationship.

(2) Find the Problem

It’s important to find the underlying problem that’s plaguing you both. If cheating happens to be a reason you both are fighting, then it’s likely that is not the underlying problem. Was there something wrong in the relationship in the first place that caused your significant other to go outside the relationship? It’s time to sit down and be critical of your relationship. Find the problem and begin to work on correcting it.

(3) Time Alone

Many couples find it hard to spend time together. Careers often get in the way of family and kids often get in the way of one on one time with each other. When a couple doesn’t have time for one another, it can lead to cheating and other heartbreaks. If this seems to be an issue, it’s time to make time for each other. If children seem to stop you from spending time with each other, hire a babysitter to take them off your hands for a bit. If careers are the problem, you may want to look at how you can spend quality time together without it interfering.

(4) Communication

After you both have worked through those underlying issues, it’s time to communicate. This is the time to really listen and talk. Only one of you should speak at a time so that you can make your point known. This is the time to reveal your feelings. Make sure you are within touching distance as this is supposed to be an intimate time together. If you are serious about saving a relationship, it’s important to get close.

(5) Make Plan to Win Them Back

If you are interested in saving a relationship, then it’s time to put together a plan that brings it back to a healthy ground. When you have a plan, you know what you need to do to get your relationship back on track. Try to schedules dates when you aren’t with the kids. Find quality time to spend together even if it’s just to talk. Your plan on saving a relationship will reap big rewards. After all, you can strengthen the bond you both want to have by being together and actually, being together.

 

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