Posts Tagged ‘after breakup’

My Ex Wants Me Back – Here’s Some Positive Signs

Wednesday, November 4th, 2009

The end of a relationship leaves a lot of mess. It’s rarely clean, crisp and straightforward and it leaves both partners with a lot of conflicting feelings. You may well be wishing you could try again. And it’s just as likely that your ex feels the same.  So if you’ve been looking for signs in what he says, what he does, who he’s with or where he goes, you might be starting to believe that he wants the same as you. But you don’t want to invite the pain of being rebuffed. So you need to be sure if your ex he wants you back.  And some of the clearest and easiest signs to read are how hard and how often he tries to get in touch with you after your breakup.

Think about how he’s approaching you.  Is he seeking you out and is he doing so more often than you might have expected in the aftermath of a breakup?  Is asking you things that lead you to believe he’s genuinely interested in how you are and what you’re doing?  Is he responding warmly to your news?  If the answers are yes then he may well be starting to realize that losing you has left a gap in his life. For many people, a breakup is one of the best ways of crystallizing feelings and bringing them to a full recognition of their feelings. This could be happening to him.

But tread carefully.  Don’t necessarily PLAY HARD TO GET but equally don’t jump to the conclusion that he’s just waiting for you to run into his arms.  It’s a process that takes a little time and if you act too soon he may not be ready and you’ll have missed your chance.  If he clearly still has feelings for you they’re unlikely to go away.  He just needs the time to recognize them fully.  So patience is the key.

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Don’t Make These 3 Mistakes after Your Breakup

Friday, January 16th, 2009

When a person is dumped, they may act out of sorts. This is especially true if the breakup was unexpected or quite bad. They want their ex back and who can blame them? Still, when they try to do this, they make three very big mistakes that can cost them their second chance. What three mistakes can these be?

 

Mistake (1) – Clinging

 

Everyone wants someone in his or her life. When your significant other decides they no longer want to be with you, it can be devastating. After all, you don’t want to be alone. You decide that clinging onto your ex is the best way to bring them back to you. That’s totally wrong. When you cling to your ex, you drive them further away. The breakup was designed to give a person some space so they could think about what they need and want in their life.

 

Mistake (2) – Drunk Dialing

 

Forgo the alcohol during the initial breakup period. If you drink, you are likely to do a major mistake called drunken dialing. What is this? It is done out of desperation where you lay your heart on your sleeve in a phone call to your ex usually in the middle of the night. What does this actually do for you? Nothing. What does it make you look like? A fool. It makes the person glad that they got away from you. In actual fact it does plenty of damage when you are trying to win them back.

 

Mistake (3) – Text Message Terrorism

 

It’s common to want to talk with your ex. After all, you were together for some time. However, calling them repeatedly can have devastating effects on your chances of winning back your ex. It doesn’t just mean calling your ex by phone either. It means texting them, emailing them, sending them instant messages, etc. When you do this, it’s as if you threw yourself at them each time. This is a big No-No. Just give your ex the space they need.

 

After your breakup while giving your ex space may be what you think is the worst thing to do, it’s actually the best thing. Space allows both of you to stay calm and plan out what to do next. Believe it or not, a break is needed from your other half from time to time. By not doing these three things, you can rest assured that your chances of winning them back are destroyed.

 

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2 Mistakes to Avoid When Getting Your Ex Back

Wednesday, January 7th, 2009

When you are dumped, it can be difficult to deal with. Your world seems to crumble around you and nothing makes sense. It’s easy to make mistakes when you aren’t thinking clearly. What sounds good is actually bad. If you are heartbroken, it’s easy to fall victim to two mistakes that ruin getting your ex back or any chance of a reunion with your ex. These two mistakes are: text message terrorism and drunken dialing.

Text Message Terrorism Mistake - What is text message terrorism? It’s when you panic about your loss and begin stalking your ex with phone calls, text messages, emails, etc. You may even try to find out where your ex is going to be so you can see them in a “chance encounter”. The worst thing you can do is to give more attention to your ex after the breakup. Instead, give them some space.

The last thing you want to look like is a desperate fool. If you want to get your ex back, you have to stay strong and not appear as if you are broken up about the breakup. When you act needy, all you are doing is pushing them further away. Your only choice is to give your ex the space he or she needs and remain cool. That means don’t go overboard with emotions and act as if you normally would.

Drunken Dialing Mistake - Most people commit this deed just once. Why? People who feel pain tend to turn to alcohol to help them through this rough time in their life. It’s actually a major faux pax. What is drunk dialing? It’s when you drink way beyond your normal capacity and decide to call your ex up in the middle of the night. You begin a spill about how they are everything in your life and how you miss them and how you wish they’d come back, so on and so forth. Sometimes they pick up the phone, other times you are throwing yourself at them by way of their answering machine or voicemail. This is a major faux pax. It makes you look desperate and sound needy. You definitely should avoid alcohol if you aren’t able to handle it or the situation. Alcohol and drugs do not do anything for you and your attempts to get your ex back.

By doing one or both of these mistakes, you can really ruin your chances of getting your ex back, especially if things seem to be going on track. However, if you have already committed one of them, it’s not impossible to recover from these issues.

 

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5 Tips to Help Heal Your Heart After a Breakup

Monday, December 8th, 2008

Life can seem excruciating when you’re suddenly alone after a relationship ends. You have problems making simple decisions. You don’t feel like getting up because it’s too much of a chore. There is no reason to make your life stop just because the relationship ended. You have to find ways to beat that hurt and maybe get your ex back in the meantime.

There are five things to consider after a breakup has occurred.

First off, do not ever let the hurt of the breakup keep you from living your life. After a breakup has happened, the best thing you can do is act like it doesn’t bother you. Stay strong and fight those feelings of depression. It’s time to show yourself (and your ex too) that you can still have a good time without them in your life. Get together with some friends who care about you. Get out with them to a social club where people you know hang out.

Secondly, do not turn to negative outlets to numb your pain. While drugs and alcohol can do wonders to get rid of the pain for a few hours, they can also loosen your tongue. You may not realize it until the next morning that you’ve done an overnighter call to your ex. You may think that telling your ex that you will always love him//her and no one will love him/her more than you is a good thing but it’s not. You come across desperate and needy. Not to mention, slurred words aren’t very attractive. You don’t want to embarrass yourself.

Third, stop talking to your ex. How long? Try a month. This month long period serves well for three purposes. First, you can heal the broken heart when you don’t see them all the time. Second, you can work on rebuilding your self-esteem and self-confidence. Third, you make your ex miss you.

Fourth, come up with some sort of plan that you intend to follow through with. When you are dealing with matters of the heart, this is the last part of your body that should be leading you. Instead listen to your mind and let it guide you.

Fifth, come to the realization that not all relationships were meant to be. This means you may have to move on whether you want to or not. Yet, acceptance of this possibility is crucial to your mental and emotional health.

These five items are just the basics that can lead you on the correct path to recovering from the pain you feel inside. All you need to remember is that by utilizing them, you can get your ex back if this is truly what you desire.

 

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5 Reasons to Staying Healthy After a Breakup

Thursday, August 21st, 2008

When you want to get your ex back, it doesn’t have to be a difficult task.  The only things you have to remember to do are to get up in the morning and face the day. No doubt any sort of depression can make you stop focusing on life but more so if the depression is due to a breakup of a relationship. It can also impair you from putting together a plan that will help you win back your ex.

However, if you want to keep from getting seriously depressed so you can win back your ex, there are five things you can do to stay on track. They are:

(1)  Do not have contact with your ex

Both of you need to take advantage of any time apart you can get. Be sure the time away is no less than a month. If you are fighting constantly, this will be best for you and for them. It also gives you time to get your life going in the right direction. Don’t worry about your ex in this month away.

(2)  Get together with friends you have neglected since your relationship began

Being with the people who care about is one way to heal your wounded heart. If you have a close knit family, go to them during this time period too. All your friends and family want for you is to be happy.

(3)  Do you have a hobby? Use this time to focus on it

However, if you are the type of person who loves going out, then be that socializing, charming person you know you are. Go out with friends if you can get them together. It’s two healings for the price of one.

(4)  Do something new for or to yourself

Get a new hairdo, buy some clothes and get some exercise. Join a gym. Of course, you need to be sure you have some money to do anything of these things. If you really want to stay cheerful, exercise is the best healer for a wounded heart. You not only begin to heal physically but emotionally too.

(5)  Now that you are single, go out and enjoy the status for awhile

You don’t have to start dating but being recognized and feeling wanted can do plenty for that self esteem and self confidence that has been shaken.

If you want to win back your ex, start with rebuilding your self-image. It’s imperative to get through any depression you feel before it gets seriously worse. You don’t want to fall into doing any drugs and alcohol. This is also true if you don’t even plan to win back your ex. However, if you really want to win back your ex, you should follow the 5 guidelines stated above.

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