Posts Tagged ‘breakups’

Win Your Ex Back: Telltale Signs to Determine What They Want

Monday, June 8th, 2009

Have you ever wondered if you could win your ex back? What if you could find out before you tried, would you? If you take a while to work on the problems at hand, you may think you have missed your shot to win him or her back. However, you shouldn’t let that stop you from finding out. How can you find out if your ex still loves and wants you?

It’s not hard to discover actually. All it takes is some time, patience and watching how they react to seeing you, watching you and talking to you. For instance, if you have to talk on the phone, listen to how open or closed they are with you. Does it seem like they want to talk with you when you call or do they initiate the telephone contact? When it seems positive that they don’t mind talking to you, this is in your favor.

However, be aware of the downside to this communication bit. If your ex doesn’t call you back or doesn’t seem to initiate contact, the truth may hurt but it’s likely they are not ready to get back together with you, if at all. You have to understand that some people, even the initiators, are unable to deal with breakups. They may cut off all contact with you so they can start the healing process. For them, being away from you gives them the ability to forget that you exist. Doing it this way can be tough.

The upside is if they open the lines of communication first. It’s possible they want you back so they’ll begin calling and seeing how you have been. You should take this as a good sign that they are attracted to you, at least a little bit. From there, he/she can determine that the love for you is still there and they’ll make the first jump of faith to have you back.

No Communication is Key to Rekindling a Relationship

Monday, June 8th, 2009

If you have ever experienced a breakup, you know how tough it can be to put your life back together. After all, they are out of your life and you are on your own again. However, there are ways to get past the hurt and perhaps rekindle a relationship.

 

The question is: do you really want him or her back. You know your heart has been shattered and that there is always the chance of them breaking it again. However, you don’t know why you are still in love with them, only that you are and want them back. If you find yourself in this sort of predicament, then you are going to have to make some sacrifices before even trying to win them back.

 

Winning Your Ex Back – How No Communication is Essential

 

Try to remember that breakups are no small thing. If you and your ex were together for a long time in a relationship and then suddenly broke up, this can create some hurtful feelings. It’s best that any communication between the both of you is kept minimal. If you must speak to one another, do not get personal. Don’t contact them unless there is a dire reason.

 

When you refuse to talk him or her, they’ll begin to question their decision of breaking it off with you. Feelings don’t go away overnight so chances are they are still thinking about you like you are about them. They’ll realize that you made them as happy as you made them mad and wonder if being away from you is the best thing for them.

 

How can you tell if he/she decides that being away from you was the wrong idea? You can tell by how they act when you have to talk. Do they respond positively? Does he/she pick up the phone more often than not when you call? Do they try to get in touch with you first? Chances are if they are doing any one of these things, they are second-guessing their decision of being away from you.

 

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3 Definitive Steps to Get an Ex Back

Thursday, February 19th, 2009

Have you recently experienced a devastating breakup? Did you wonder what you could get your ex back? Believe it or not, breaking up is an experience nearly every adult endures at least once in their life. Instead of working to get an ex back, they decide to move forward with their lives without their ex. However, if you want an ex back you do have options. Don’t let a breakup stop you from getting an ex back.

The reality of most breakups is that you do have a chance to win back your ex at least 90 percent of the time. However, you have to know what steps you should and should not take to get an ex back. So what are the steps you should take in order to win back an ex?

First, identify what caused the breakup. Did you do something that the other person faults you for? You can’t hop into the past and change the mistake but you can work to change making the same one and others. That means you must learn from your mistakes and work to make sure they do not happen once again.

Get the specifics on the reason. Perhaps it was a single mistake that you never intended to make such as cheating. Perhaps it was a culmination of mistakes that your ex just no longer could deal with. If you want an ex back, figure out how you can change the situation for the long term.

Second, don’t start pleading your case. Nothing turns an ex off more than their ex turning into a needy person. When you have been with someone for some time, it can be easy to feel like you can’t live without them in your life but simply isn’t true. The best thing you can do to get an ex back is to act like you are fine and be confident with the things around you.

Third, don’t consider making your ex jealous as a way to get an ex back. Trying to use jealousy as a way to get them back can do one of two things:

- It makes your ex believe that you have moved on.
- It can backfire in your face when you are using the person to make your ex jealous.

Let your ex see that you’re all right, strong and self confident without them beside you. By doing this, you work towards the goal of getting an ex back as they feel inspired to work things out with you.

         

 

 

 

Text Message Terrorism: Why You Need to Stop This Mistake

Monday, February 9th, 2009

Breakups can cause a bit of turmoil for the couple involved and the friends that help them through it. However, breakups are a time when most people aren’t relying on their common sense to see through the tough times. In fact, the lack of common sense that they have leads to greater problems including making the mistake of doing text message terrorism.

What is text message terrorism? Its name is what it implies. When you are desperate to talk with your ex about inane things, you’ll try every method of communication to get a hold of them. The inane things have nothing to do with what you are calling about. Be honest with yourself. You are calling to keep in touch with your ex so they will know you are still around.

Remember text message terrorism isn’t just getting a hold of your ex via text messages. It’s getting in touch with them through the phone lines, through the internet using email or instant messengers like Yahoo, MSN or Skype. Any method of contact can be construed as text message terrorism.

Do you want to get back together with your ex? If so, you have to be respectful of their wishes and not contacting them many times every single day. Constant unwanted contact is actually harassment. You don’t come across as fun and loving but desperate, needy and a little psychotic.

Text message terrorism will only send your ex further away from you. No contact is best for your situation. Think about it. If you broke up with someone, would you want to constantly have messages from them, asking you to return their calls? Remember, the breakup occurred because of a breakdown in communications. Keep this in mind as you dial your ex’s number to leave yet another message.

What can you do? First, stop what you are doing and breathe deeply. Remember that text message terrorism is not the way to win your ex’s heart so find another better way to reconnect with them. However, give yourself and your ex a period of time with no contact and see what comes of it.

 

Win Your Ex Back: Follow a Five-Step Method

Thursday, January 29th, 2009

Everyone can agree that breakups are cruel and leave behind a mess of feelings from anger to hurt to depression. However, the breakup doesn’t have to be difficult to deal with. If you want a way to move forward with your life easily, use these five steps to win back your ex.

Win Your Ex Back Step 1 – Take Your Time

A big mistake many people make is rushing their ex to decide whether to give them a second chance or not. Actually, this can be very bad. Be sure you don’t give your ex a lot of attention. In fact, don’t talk with or see them for some time that way your ex can gather their thoughts and find out what they want. You may be surprised that space works wonders when you are trying to win them back.

Win Your Ex Back Step 2 – Analyze What Happened

During this no-contact time, you should be trying to figure out the things that went wrong for you in the relationship. While you can’t fix their side of things, you can work on yours. Find out what were the main sticky points that led to the breakup that way if you do get a second chance, those same mistakes won’t rear their ugly heads again.

Win Your Ex Back Step 3 – Light Contact

Okay, so you let a month pass, right? Now this is the time that you can make some contact with your ex. However, don’t get into a long drown out tirade about things. Try keeping the conversation light, asking how they have been and what they have been up to. The worst thing you can do is to plead your case. Take things slow and see how things are from there.

Win Your Ex Back Step 4 – Spend Time Together

Once everything seems kosher with breakup mess, you’re liable to spend time with your ex. Do things as a couple but do them as if you are a new couple. You can always do things that you both used to enjoy together but don’t dwell on the past. Memories of the good times are likely to occur and rekindle those long lost feelings. This is the time to remind your ex how you once were and why they were in love with you in the first place.

Win Your Ex Back Step 5 – Keeping Your Ex

Now that you have your second chance, you have to keep it. The changes you made to win them over have to be kept up. Do it for them and for yourself. If you let your “bad” side show again, you aren’t likely to get a third chance.

You have to make sacrifices when you really love someone. Make sure you meet your partner’s needs and if something seems amiss talk to them about your feelings. You don’t want to let anything fester and ruin your second chance.

 

Helpful Tips to Getting Through the Breakup Pain

Friday, January 9th, 2009

When you are in pain dealing with a breakup, it’s easy to lose track of the things that are going on in your life. After all, your life is in total chaos.  However, you don’t want this breakup to ruin your life or your chances to win back your ex, right? So how do you handle the rigors of breakups and not fall apart trying to do so?

Always pay attention to the important parts of your life. Make sure your social and personal levels are maintained and covered. You don’t want anything to slip through the cracks. What does this mean?

How to Get Your Ex Back From A Personal Level Standpoint

Always maintain yourself. What does this mean? It means being or getting physically fit, staying healthy mentally and be conscientious about our hygiene. If you are unhealthy in the weight department, get some exercise and eat right. Don’t let your feelings about the breakup destroy how you feel about yourself even further.

What does it mean by being healthy mentally? It means to work on your own attitude and how you feel about yourself on the inside. Look at your situation and see what you can do to change it. Many people who go through a breakup take it hard and it affects their self-esteem. You want to stay positive and optimistic about what your future holds for you. You already know that getting your ex back is going to be a challenge. Don’t add more stress to it by second-guessing everything you are and everything you do.

Your social life is also a very important part of who you are. Breakups are tough to deal with it so don’t go it alone. Instead, find a support circle such as friends, family and any others that will let you have a shoulder to cry or lend an ear for you to talk. Make sure that you go out with close friends to the local scene. Be optimistic and stay positive about things in your life. You should let your ex see this “strong” feeling even if you don’t feel so “strong” about the situation. It makes them wonder if they did the right thing.

Don’t doubt that you are a special person. When you do this, you just add more stress to an already stressful situation. They are many people who can support you and give you advice. Make sure that this breakup doesn’t destroy the person you are and everything that is important to you in your life. In the end, you’ll save yourself a ton of grief. Hope some of these advices will help you get through the breakup pain.

 

 

How You Can Win Back Your Ex

Tuesday, January 6th, 2009

Many people believe that fixing their ex will win them back. However, this isn’t the truth and does no good. The person you should be fixing is yourself and even that is not completely what you should be concerned about. Why?

Relationships that have ended in breakups or divorces have faults that lie on both sides. However, the person that was dumped is usually the ones that will try to fix the huge problems in order to win back their ex. If you have been dumped, you are the person who will be fixing those problems.

You probably look at that and say, “Well, that’s not fair.” You’re absolutely right. If you want to win back your ex, you have to stop worrying with your ex’s issues and worry about your own. What can you do differently or do better at? If you are the one desiring to make the relationship work, then you are the one that’s going to have to work at the problems.

Does this mean you are completely at fault for the relationship dissolving? Not at all. It takes two people to make a relationship work and it takes two people to make it fail. Never believe you are the only one that has to do all the changing. Your ex, if he or she is willing to work it out, will have to make some concessions and changes too. Believe it or not, when your ex sees you trying to make those changes, they’ll want to make changes to their lives as well.

You are the only person that can fix all the problems that you face. When you try to change your ex, you’ll only alienating them further away from you. Be sure you focus on yourself and perhaps, in due time, your ex will be back.

2 Harmful Mistakes That Follows Breakups

Saturday, December 20th, 2008

When you have been told by your boyfriend/girlfriend that they don’t love you any longer the only option is to breakup, it can feel as if your world has been shattered. You may find it difficult to make sensible choices. You may not care about anything other than getting them back. You think that life is out to get you and you become quite susceptible to the outside world’s influences. If you want to avoid becoming a victim and work to win your ex back, steer clear of these two harmful mistakes.

(1) Isolation – Many people tend to retreat back into their homes to escape the feelings that they have. They may feel like no one understands their predicament or cares how they feel. When people who have been dumped feel this way, they often don’t worry about what happens to themselves either.

It is vital that social activity is kept up. When you go out with friends, you get through the tougher times quicker and easier. There are still a ton of people who care what happens to you so let them lighten your load just a bit. When you are extremely depressed, this can weigh on your physical health and become a bigger problem than the initial cause.

(2) Physical Inactivity – It’s important that you remain physical in your life. When you don’t, every aspect about you begins to look unhealthy. When your ex is no longer attracted to you, you may take it as a sign that you are unattractive and may stop taking care of yourself. You may spend weeks feeling sorry for yourself and it is not healthy for you.

When you are physically active, you tend to feel better emotionally and psychologically. All you have to do is get a little exercise to get your blood pumping. You’ll start to feel more energized and ready to face the world, despite the recent breakup.

It doesn’t matter which avenue you take so long as you avoid these two negative consequences that come with being dumped. It’s important to move past it if your plans are to win your ex back. Don’t let breakup lead you to a depression because you’ll have a hard time getting out of the hole you dug for yourself.

 

2 Big Mistakes Can Cost Your Chance with Your Ex

Saturday, December 20th, 2008

Breakups can be messy, very messy. You may be prone to make bad choices, choices you wouldn’t have dared made before the breakup. There are several mistakes people make but two most important mistakes that can kill any chance of your winning back your ex include drunken dialing and text message terrorism.

Drunk Dialing – If you haven’t experienced this yourself, chances are…you know someone who has done it. What is it? It’s those late night phone calls you think will do you good but don’t. Who do you call? The person who you just broken up with, in fact. You may plead your case but you probably do so in a manner that does nothing more for them other than them going, “Yep, okay, whatever” and hang up. Never call your ex when you have been drinking. In fact, the best thing to do during those hurtful times is to not touch alcohol at all.

Text Message Terrorism – Everybody has been guilty at one stage or another of burning up the phone lines with repeated calls to someone. Text message terrorism isn’t limited to just text messaging. It means calling your ex repeatedly by way of phone, email, or text messages. When you decide to go this route, your ex is bound to change his or her number and email, regardless of the cost.

What should you be doing? Close those lines of communication for about a month. Work through your pain and anger and absolutely do not engage in negative behaviors that could lead to these two mistakes. If you are forced to see each other through work or school, be civil and kind but absolutely no personal discussions of any sort.

 

3 Common Mistakes People Make After a Breakup

Saturday, September 6th, 2008

When you are going through a breakup, the feelings associated with it can be quite dramatic. Your mind thinks of all the things that happened and all you want to do are to win your ex back and fix the relationship. However, there are three mistakes you need to avoid making during the initial breakup period.

Heartbroken people typically do several things without realizing that they are doing it, tarnishing their chances at winning their ex back. However, there are three things that really ruin a chance at getting your ex back when all you want to do is get them back. Here are what you need to avoid to win back your ex: the pity party, drunk dialing and text message terrorism.

Relationship Makeup Mistake Number (1) – The Pity Party

What is a pity party? It’s pretty self explanatory actually. This happens when a person who was dumped lets themselves go, emotionally and physically. They refuse to deal with life and refuses to do anything fun. They would rather sit on the couch and watch television all day long, perhaps crying that they lost their significant other. How can you stop or reduce the chances of a pity party? You need to still live life like you did before the relationship started. If you stay in this frame of mind, you only hurt yourself.

Relationship Makeup Mistake Number (2) – Drunk Dialing

How does drunk dialing begin? First, you start to drink to dull the pain of the breakup. Then, you drink far beyond your normal levels and before you know it, you’re drunk. Then, you decide to call your ex. Now you need to know that alcohol and pain are never a good combination so what you say can be very bad. You decide to make the phone call and tell him or her how much you love them, how you can’t live without them and how you wish they would give you a second chance. As soon as you leave the message or sober up, you realize that leaving that message was the worst thing you could have done.

Relationship Makeup Mistake Number (3) – Text Message Terrorism

Text Message Terrorism is quite similar to drunk dialing. Yet, you can’t excuse the behavior on alcohol because you are usually sober when you do this. What is it? It’s when you overwhelm their phones and e-mails, begging them for another chance. You may think that this helps you but it only hinders your chances or getting them back.

You don’t have to worry should you have succumbed to one or two of these breakup mistakes. If you want to win your ex back, you need to immediately stop what you are doing and come up with a plan that can help you get your ex back.