Posts Tagged ‘dumped’

Relationship Breakup – The Things That Broke You Up and How to Fix Them

Thursday, December 24th, 2009

Serious relationships fail for all kinds of reasons.  Sometimes there will be a gradual cooling off, sometimes a temporary estrangement and at other times an apparently irreconcilable rift.  If you want a second chance then you need to take a cold hard look at what really caused the breakup.  It may not be pleasant but this is the time for honesty and in the end… can only be positive.

One very common cause is infidelity. If your ex dumped you for this reason then it’s a pretty safe bet that you were the guilty party.  What you’ve done is a very serious transgression. 

Relationships can be rebuilt after an episode like this but it takes time so be prepared for a long haul.  The love is still there but one thing that will take a great deal longer to repair is trust.  It won’t be pleasant or easy but keep that in mind and you may be able to salvage even this grim situation.

Another common cause is one partner trying to control the other.  Everybody jokes about control freaks and we see them in all walks of life.  But nobody wants them in their love life.  If the one you’re with wants to control what you do, how you act, where you go, even what you think, then it’s a clear sign that either they don’t trust you, or don’t respect you or don’t even like you the way you are.  If you’ve behaved like this, you need to admit it to yourself and to him and promise both of you that you’ll change.  Love him for who he is, not for who you’re mistakenly trying to turn him into.

Finally, partners will often abandon a relationship because they themselves feel abandoned, emotionally.  An important part of any serious relationship is the emotional support that you give each other.  Don’t underestimate how much your partner needs and values this.  Everyone is an individual – don’t judge his demands by your own and respect his emotional needs for what they are.

How a Rebound Relationship Can Bring Back Your Ex

Friday, June 19th, 2009

Were you dumped and depressed about it? Did it take you some time to get over the hurt? Did you finally realize it was time to move past it and find a way to get your ex back? Did you discover that your ex isn’t single anymore? Well, now how do you win him or her back if they are dating someone else? Actually, that rebound relationship is the way to get your ex back. How?

Look at it from this point of view: your ex decides to break it off with you. You were in a relationship with him or her for some time. This rebound relationship is a way to distract them from the pain they are feeling. It isn’t likely that marriage is creeping into the picture any time soon for them. Nearly all rebound relationships don’t last for very long. It’s actually their way of getting past the hurt they feel too.

Actually, perhaps it’s best to have your own rebound relationship. It’s best to have one so you can deal with the pain of losing your significant other. On top of that rebound relationships will help you realize that you are still wanted by the opposite sex and do help in getting over the heartbreak. However, you don’t have to stay with this person very long, if you choose not to. Remember, these relationships won’t rid the memories you have but help ease them from replaying in your mind day in and day out. Rebound relationships don’t always mean your ex is over you. It can mean they are trying to get move past those hurt and lonely feelings they have for you.

Rebound relationships tend to make people think about what they really want out of life and most of the time, it can lead to couples being back together again. They realize that the differences and arguments they have weren’t so bad. It usually means they’d rather be together than without each other. If your ex seems to have moved on without you, don’t panic. There’s still a chance for you to get them back.

How Can I Win My Ex Girlfriend Back

Monday, May 25th, 2009

Have you been dumped and asked yourself “can I win back my ex girlfriend?” If you are asking yourself this question, chances are the breakup wasn’t all that bad and you hope that you ex will feel the same way about you as you do her. However, if things were said during the breakups that were meant to hurt, then you should apologize now before it’s too late. The first step on the road to making up is admitting the wrongs you did, apologizing and meaning it.

Have you ever asked yourself if that showing your sensitive side is way to ‘win back my ex girlfriend’?

Simply put… it couldn’t hurt. When you show that you do have a sensitive side, you tell her that you can be more than just a macho jerk. Instead, show her how you feel and how sorry you are about things not working out. However, if you try to show her affections and this seems to upset her, you’ll need to approach her in a different way.

Some women think that buying flowers or cards is just too simple. Cards that are printed and mass produced can be a little too simple. No real thought was put behind it. If you want to know what you should do to win your ex girlfriend back then think like her for a moment. What would you want? If you are going for the card route, find one that’s blank and put your own words or poem in it. By expressing how you feel you can win her over. For flowers, pick them yourself, making your own bouquet and hand them to her.

What is the chief complaint about men from women? It’s that men aren’t thoughtful enough. Think back… were you thoughtful? Are you thinking right now, “can I win back my ex girlfriend by just being thoughtful”? It’s a step toward it but not the surefire way to win her back.

If you stopped doing thoughtful things in the relationship, the chances of her recognizing that you are being sincere are small. This is when you need to exercise patience. Do these things for her so that she knows that all you want is to make her feel loved.
 
Have you wondered if you can win her back by going out with other women?  Casual dating doesn’t hurt anyone and if you are still trying to be thoughtful to her, she’ll wish that she were the date instead of the other woman. However, if it continues all the time, it could backfire.
 
‘Can I win my ex girlfriend back’ if she has a new man in her life? You have a slim chance to do this but if you can prove to her that she’d be happier with you than her current beau then there is a chance you can win her back. Don’t forget to be thoughtful and don’t give up without giving yourself a chance. If everything points to her moving on, send a card telling her to have a great week. Being thoughtful can go a long way to win back your ex girlfriend.

Not Your Ex Any More: How to Make This Happen

Sunday, April 12th, 2009

Yesterday, you had somebody to love. Today, you’ve been dumped. This can really alter how you see life for several weeks or months. You, like most others, don’t want to be depressed for that long. You’d rather get over the situation, move on with life and get your ex back. There are ways you can make this happen.

 

There are ways you can make this happen by staying positive.  The worst thing you can do is stay on the couch, crying your eyes out, wearing your pajamas. If you want to show your ex why you deserve a second chance, you need to show your ex that you are doing okay without them. You can do this in two ways. These are:

 

(1)  Appearance

Keep up your appearance. You may feel like letting yourself go but if you look stunning, you can manipulate your ex to give you a second chance. You could still be hurting inside but project the image that you are a strong, attractive person who won’t let bad news or days spoil their lives. By keeping up your appearance, you have more confidence in yourself.

 

(2)  Staying Social

Now that your outward appearance is fixed, it’s time to show it off. Get to where the people are. How can you get your ex back if he or she doesn’t see you or have mutual friends see you and send word back to them. What you shouldn’t do is sit in a corner, sipping on drinks. You need to get out there on the dance floor and have some fun. If you show them that life can go on without them, chances are they’ll be wondering why they broke up with you in the first place.

 

If you are having a good time with your friends, you may find yourself feeling better being single again. Those distractions you used to get your ex back will make you wonder why you ever felt sad in the first place.

 

2 Mistakes to Avoid When Getting Your Ex Back

Wednesday, January 7th, 2009

When you are dumped, it can be difficult to deal with. Your world seems to crumble around you and nothing makes sense. It’s easy to make mistakes when you aren’t thinking clearly. What sounds good is actually bad. If you are heartbroken, it’s easy to fall victim to two mistakes that ruin getting your ex back or any chance of a reunion with your ex. These two mistakes are: text message terrorism and drunken dialing.

Text Message Terrorism Mistake - What is text message terrorism? It’s when you panic about your loss and begin stalking your ex with phone calls, text messages, emails, etc. You may even try to find out where your ex is going to be so you can see them in a “chance encounter”. The worst thing you can do is to give more attention to your ex after the breakup. Instead, give them some space.

The last thing you want to look like is a desperate fool. If you want to get your ex back, you have to stay strong and not appear as if you are broken up about the breakup. When you act needy, all you are doing is pushing them further away. Your only choice is to give your ex the space he or she needs and remain cool. That means don’t go overboard with emotions and act as if you normally would.

Drunken Dialing Mistake - Most people commit this deed just once. Why? People who feel pain tend to turn to alcohol to help them through this rough time in their life. It’s actually a major faux pax. What is drunk dialing? It’s when you drink way beyond your normal capacity and decide to call your ex up in the middle of the night. You begin a spill about how they are everything in your life and how you miss them and how you wish they’d come back, so on and so forth. Sometimes they pick up the phone, other times you are throwing yourself at them by way of their answering machine or voicemail. This is a major faux pax. It makes you look desperate and sound needy. You definitely should avoid alcohol if you aren’t able to handle it or the situation. Alcohol and drugs do not do anything for you and your attempts to get your ex back.

By doing one or both of these mistakes, you can really ruin your chances of getting your ex back, especially if things seem to be going on track. However, if you have already committed one of them, it’s not impossible to recover from these issues.

 

How You Can Win Back Your Ex

Tuesday, January 6th, 2009

Many people believe that fixing their ex will win them back. However, this isn’t the truth and does no good. The person you should be fixing is yourself and even that is not completely what you should be concerned about. Why?

Relationships that have ended in breakups or divorces have faults that lie on both sides. However, the person that was dumped is usually the ones that will try to fix the huge problems in order to win back their ex. If you have been dumped, you are the person who will be fixing those problems.

You probably look at that and say, “Well, that’s not fair.” You’re absolutely right. If you want to win back your ex, you have to stop worrying with your ex’s issues and worry about your own. What can you do differently or do better at? If you are the one desiring to make the relationship work, then you are the one that’s going to have to work at the problems.

Does this mean you are completely at fault for the relationship dissolving? Not at all. It takes two people to make a relationship work and it takes two people to make it fail. Never believe you are the only one that has to do all the changing. Your ex, if he or she is willing to work it out, will have to make some concessions and changes too. Believe it or not, when your ex sees you trying to make those changes, they’ll want to make changes to their lives as well.

You are the only person that can fix all the problems that you face. When you try to change your ex, you’ll only alienating them further away from you. Be sure you focus on yourself and perhaps, in due time, your ex will be back.

Breaking Up – 5 Mistakes You Need To Refrain From Doing

Saturday, January 3rd, 2009

When you don’t think clearly after a breakup (and most people don’t), it’s not hard to do things you will regret on down the road. Breakups and divorces have a profound effect on anyone’s life so it’s no real surprise that costly mistakes can and do happen. If you want to win back your ex, you should be aware of those five mistakes.

Breakup Errors (1) – Too Needy

One of the first things a significant other, who has just been broken up with does, is try to be with their ex all the time. However, this is a huge mistake and should never be done. The reason you were dumped is that your ex needed some space… away from you. While it’s cruel, it’s the truth. Give him or her the space they need so that you can deal with them on down the road.

Breakup Errors (2) – Text Message Terrorism

It’s time to stop calling or emailing your ex 50 times a day. This does little in the way of helping you. In fact, you become the psycho ex who just does not take a hint. The chances of them changing their phone number are probably good if you don’t quit this now.

Breakup Errors (3) – Lose of Emotional Control

It’s normal to feel out of control in this kind of situation but the worst thing you can do for yourself is to let it control you. Work through those emotions that you feel but no matter how dire the situation is, don’t let your pain rule your life. Face the day and keep moving ahead.

Breakup Errors (4) – Substance Abuse

It is so important that you do not turn to drugs or alcohol to deal with your pain. There are so many things that can go wrong when you do this. For instance, you decide to drink one night and call your ex up. While in your stupor you think this is a great idea, it’s no doubt the worst idea. All you come across has is a raving lunatic. It’s best to never pick up this costly habit.

Breakup Error (5) – Changing Your Ex

As much as men and women want to believe it, no one can change another person. You can’t control them and you certainly can’t force them to come back to you. However, you can do some changes that make them desire you all over again. Change what you can of yourself and it’s likely your ex will do the same.

 

3 Best Tips to Win Back Your Ex Girlfriend

Tuesday, October 21st, 2008

When you have been dating a woman for sometime, you may be shocked when they just suddenly dump you without a good reason. It may shake your confidence and self-esteem whether you believe it or not. Men are depicted as a strong brute that can get through anything but this just is not true. A man has much pride and feelings too. When a woman or a man is dumped, it can hurt as equally. I know how you feel but don’t fret. You can win back your ex girlfriend so long as you know what you are doing but not because you want to get back at her.

Can this be difficult? Yes it can be. However, developing a plan before you attempt to do this can help you in the pursuit. There are 3 things to keep in mind when you try to win back your ex girlfriend.

First off, you do not want to appear desperate wanting to her decision and why she left you. If you become overly aggressive trying to win back her affections, you’ll end up scaring her away and possibly permanently for good. Even though you are in pain, chances are so is she. Begin the lines of communication with patient slowly. If you want to win her heart back, you have to have patient. Being under stress and adding more stress to the mess can make anyone hightail it away from the stress culprit.

Second, continue to go out with your group of friends. Show your ex that you can have a good time without her in your life. She doesn’t even have to be present for you to make an impact. If you continue to have a good time out in public, chances are she’ll get wind of it and become slightly jealous and start to find out more. Is she doing better than you? Probably she is not. Why? Breakups can take a toll on both persons. If you can show her that your life can go on without her, she’s likely to call you up again.

She’ll begin to think that she made a mistake in breaking up with you. She’s more likely to come back to you with open arms and an open mind. Next, you have the option to let your ex girlfriend back into your arms and heart if you still feel you need her back. You have the choice to choose if she is really what you want in your life. That time apart typically sheds new light on the relationship and you may find yourself choosing not to be with her after all.

Third, don’t turn to negative outlets that can lower your thought process. When loneliness hits, it can be natural to turn towards alcohol and sometimes drugs too. Yet, these outlets can lead to you making devastating consequences such as drunk dialing. What is drunk dialing? It’s that overnight call you make when you are high on drugs or drink too much whisky, bourbon or other alcohol beverage. You pour your heart out on the phone to them or their voicemail. You think you are doing some good but in actuality, you’re only confirming what she suspects: you’re desperate.

You may not remember making this phone call but she’ll certainly hear it. It’s naïve to think that a message of love will win back your ex girlfriend’s heart. The chances that she’ll tell her friends are good and you’ll become the laughing stock of her friends and perhaps yours too. Stay away from these outlets if you want a chance to win her back.

These tips seem pretty straightforward but they are just the beginning. In reality, winning back an ex can be difficult. It just takes some time and patience to accomplish.

 

4 Things That Hurt Your Chances to Win Back Your Ex

Sunday, October 19th, 2008

It’s a devastating thing to be dumped.  When you’ve been with someone so long, it can be tough to not have that person beside you any longer. However, you might be surprised to learn that life does go on after a breakup. You can be happy even after your ego has taken a blow such as this. If you desire to win back your ex and get your life back on track as well, there are 4 things you need to do that can help you to achieve this.

(1) Desperate/Contacting Your Ex

One of the biggest blunders you can make is trying to prove to your ex why you should still be in their lives and try to make the situation work. While it’s normal to react in such a way, it’s the worst thing you can do actually. The best thing you should do is keep contact to a minimum or have no contact with them whatsoever. If you have to work together or have classes together, then be civil but don’t get personal. Your goal is to have them miss you.

(2) Turning to Negative Outlets

Many people do stupid things when they are dealing with the aftermath of a breakup. One of the dumbest things a person can do is use alcohol or drugs to numb the pain they are feeling. Not only are they bad for your health wise but they can also make you do dumb things like drunk dialing. What is drunk dialing? It’s when you think calling your ex is a brilliant idea to explain your side of things and how you wish you two were together, so on and so forth.

However bad you may want to call your ex, this is something you should not do. While it seems like a good plan when you think about then, it actually sends them further away and avoiding you, thinking you are actually a nut. All you come across is a needy, whiny and desperate person.

(3) Appearing Rough

One of the worst things you can do is be lazy in your appearance out in public. This is the time to make you look better. If you don’t like your skin, do something about it. Need some new clothes? Go on a small shopping spree. You may even just need a simple hair cut to make yourself feel and look better or lose some weight. Try something that makes you feel better about being you while making your ex jealous in the process.

(4) Staying Home

After your appearance has improved to the way you want, call some friends to get out of the house. Go out to places that people know you and care to help you get over your ex. Doing this can also win back your ex’s notice especially if they happen to hear or see that you are out having a good time. You may feel completely helpless about the situation but if you put up a “front” about moving ahead in life, it makes your ex to take a second glance at you.

While there are other things that can ruin your chances of winning your ex back, these 4 things can be avoided and allow you to get that person beside you one more time.

 

3 Easy Tips to Surviving a Breakup

Sunday, September 21st, 2008

After you have been dumped, the feeling of loneliness hits. Life can be unbearable and you probably feel life is not worth living. However, there are 3 tips to help you survive a breakup.

Survive a Breakup Tip Number (1) – Obsessing

Do not obsessive over your ex. Obsessing what went wrong in the relationship and how much of the breakup was your fault. The list can go on and on. First thing… stop! Find other things that can take your mind off of your ex. Do something that won’t remind you of them.

Survive a Breakup Tip Number (2) – Physical Activity

Take up any kind of physical activity to keep yourself preoccupied from thinking of them. It also allows you to work out the stress and emotions you may be feeling. No matter what kind of exercise you are choosing to do, it helps you work through the pain as well as get in shape

Survive a Breakup Tip Number (3) – Get Together With Loved Ones

Find your friends and go out to have a good time. It can be a relaxing thing to do just to go out with the people who care about you. This can be difficult if your ex was a part of the group. While drinking heavily is not advised during this emotional time, drinking moderately can take the edge off. Remember that heavy drinking can lead to some friends alienating you and you losing a chance to get your ex back.

While there is no easy solution to solve the problems that plagued the relationship, just using these 3 tips to survive a breakup can help you become better emotionally. Then you can handle the things you need to deal with that caused the breakup in the first place.

Every breakup that happened is unique, find out how breakupcures.com can help you out in your situation.