Posts Tagged ‘relationship’

4 Reasons Relationships Fail

Monday, August 25th, 2008

Each day brings about new problems. These problems could destroy a relationship without a moment’s notice. Though many can be seen, some cannot. Yet, should you recognize those that are troubling your relationship and try to work past them so your relationship stays on the right course. However, there are 4 common issues that can end your relationship. By recognizing them, you can reduce the damage that may be done to your relationship.

Problem Number (1) – Cheating/Infidelity

There is no greater threat to a relationship ending then one partner cheating on the other person. Cheating brings about so many dangers but can also hurt you and your “supposed” partner. This cheating destroys any trust, feeling and forgiveness your partner may have for you. Cheating, unfortunately, is a common occurrence in society and is rising. How can you keep from destroying your relationship? It’s quite simple… don’t cheat. Leave your clothing on for the one you chose to be with. However, if you do cheat, the best things you can do are to beg for forgiveness and change your ways.

Problem Number (2) – Lack of Affection

When couples love each other, it’s easy to show some sort of affection. However, over time, you may still love each other but take each other for granted, assuming that the other knows how you feel. Instead, keep them informed of your feelings. Not doing this can lead to hard feelings and breakups. You can prevent this breakup by letting your other half know how much you love them and how important they are to you.

Problem Number (3) – In-fighting

Would you believe that fighting in a relationship can be good for it? It’s very natural for couples to fight and it’s healthy too. Yet, it can be dangerous too. Don’t lose your cool over every single thing. Fights can tell you what the pertinent issues your relationship is facing. If they are overlooked and not dealt with, your relationship could end. However, remind yourselves that you do love each other, why you fell in love and take the good things along with the bad ones.

Problem Number (4) – Controlling Partner

While in the romantic movies it may be funny to see the overbearing girlfriend/wife, brandishing a cell phone, demanding to know where her boyfriend/husband has been. The man may sit there and tell her “Yes, ma’am, Yes, dear”. However, real life is never that funny and should never been viewed as such. No one, man or woman, should tell you what to do, how to act and certainly should never control anything about you. A relationship like this lacks trust. It’s also seen as a form of abuse too… psychological abuse. If you are with your partner, you should have some trust in him or her.

While there are other reasons for a relationship to die, these 4 are the most important ones to know.  If there is some sort of conflict in the relationship, try to fix the problem. By remembering the 4 reasons a relationship fails, you lessen your chance to end your relationship and ruin your happiness.

 

A Clean Break: Never Let Your Ex Use You

Monday, August 4th, 2008

Men and women have a tendency to feel if they stick by their ex’s side after the break up, it can only work in their favor. The truth is this can actually hurt your chances of getting back together with your ex. What does this mean?

For many people, a breakup doesn’t always end a relationship. It just means there is no more commitment to the other person. It’s a freedom that allows them to date other people. Some people are content with having sex with their exes just to have the feeling of being wanted. However, this can lead to mistakes not just for women but for men as well.

While you may think being there for your ex gives you a chance to show them that you love them and you care what happens to them, it doesn’t mean they will understand this. How can they miss you and know this if they are always with you.

Have you ever heard the phrase, “Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?” Yes, it is a bit crude but in this case, it does pertain to the issue at hand. If he or she gets the benefits of a relationship but with no strings attached, why would he or she want to be in a committed relationship with you again? There are many ex couples who sleep together while they sleep with other people too. This is very dangerous.

If you have some dignity and some pride, do not let this happen to you. Make it clear to your ex that it’s either everything or nothing. They can’t have their cake and eat it too. You want them to live a life with you or without you and without you mean getting a nice, clean break from there. This forces them to live their life without you in it.

Once you cut him or her off, they’ll come to realize how important you were in their life and that life doesn’t seem worth living without you in it. They could still be dating other people but suddenly understand that the feelings he thought were gone are still there for you. If you want a chance to getting back together with your ex and make them realize these feelings, take a stand and cut them off.

 

If You Want Ex Back – Stop Further Conflict

Thursday, July 24th, 2008

If you have been dumped, you probably think that the only way to get your ex back would be to see them and talk with them constantly.  This is, in fact, counter productive. If you stop talking with them for a specific amount of time (3-4 weeks will do) then you’ll see that there are several benefits to waiting.

 

If you and your ex are fighters, it is best to spend some time apart so both of you can cool your heads. This is especially true for couples who just broke up. If you feel like you both can have a go at the relationship after some time apart, then it is best not to see each other for about a month. Seeing each other causes more conflict and honestly, the time apart is rather good for all involved.

 

After the peaceful month has passed, both of you should be less unreceptive. You can settle all those issues that drove you apart with an open mind and open heart, thus starting the healing process. If you want to get your ex back with confidence, it is necessary to give yourselves this break.

 

No matter the type of breakup you have, whether it is constantly fighting with each other or having a mutual time away, it is a way to rekindle the flames and fire in your relationship. If you are constantly seeing each other, it’s like you never broke up and both of you won’t have the time to miss one another.

 

Remember these two old expressions, “You don’t appreciate what you have until it’s gone” and “Absence makes the heart grow fonder”. How can you be appreciated if you never actually leave. He or she won’t have the opportunity to know what he or she is missing if you are always together. If the breakup was under a mutual understanding, there is always a chance for another shot. Yet, he or she will never see it…so spend some quality time apart.

 

When it seems everything is falling apart around you, it can be hard to make any sort of correct decisions. Don’t react to your circumstances. Instead react with a plan to those circumstances. Hence this reason for the time apart, you can develop some sort of plan to get your ex back.

 

Without a plan, people act in all kinds of ways. You may lack the right words, turning off your ex. You may come off as needy thus sending your ex running from your attempts to get back together. So, embrace this month long hiatus to develop a plan that has actually worked. Don’t do what you think works, do what does work.

 

If you really are serious about getting back together with your ex, then you should take the advice you get just as seriously. Sometimes it’s difficult from staying away from the one you love but if you want your ex back, you really need to do give yourself and your ex a break.